Toxic friendships and why they’re no good for you.

Something that I’ve learnt to be particularly important over the past year or so is self care. Whether that be spending time making yourself look stunning every morning, getting enough sleep every night or simply spending a few hours doing something that you enjoy. Making enough time for yourself is a key element in helping maintain good mental health. Whether you’re somebody that suffers with a mental illness or not.

Putting enough time and effort into your own mental health is only the half of it though. In order to really start feeling good about your life and feel truly comfortable with who you are you’ll need to make some tough decisions regarding who you surround yourself with.

Who are the toxic people in your life?

Stop and think about it for a moment. Who are those people in your life that make you feel bad about yourself?

These people might not even realise that they have such an effect on you and your mental state of mind. It might just be the way they’ve always been. It might just be their nature. But if they bring you down and make you feel inferior on a regular basis then they don’t deserve to be a part of your life. What right do they have to make you feel bad?

It doesn’t matter who they are either. Even if they’re a so-called friend who you’ve known since you were young and they make you feel down – bin them off.

Photo by Trinity Kubassek on

For those of you who use Facebook on a regular basis – take a look at your friends list. How many of the people on that list are really your friend? How many of those people can you honestly, hand-on-heart say are friends that would always be there for you? How many of those so-called friends make you laugh and smile and lift your mood when it’s hit rock bottom?

How many of those so-called friends couldn’t actually give a toss about you and only added you to make their friend count bigger and their egos grow?

Let’s face it. If we were all honest for a moment and culled our friend lists down to just those people who truly know you, who genuinely care about you and how you’re feeling – we would probably all end up with a friend count that’s in single figures.

cell phone in hands
Photo by Kaboompics .com on

I’m somebody who doesn’t have a huge amount of friends. But those that I do have I trust implicitly. I know that if I were having a particularly bad day in terms of my mental health they would be there for me at the drop of a hat. Likewise, I would be there for them. Those people don’t make me feel low or bad or like I’m somehow not as good as them. They respect me for the person that I am and don’t judge me if I somehow screw up.

So surround yourself with the sort of people that make you feel good. The sort of people that will always be there to pick you up when you fall.

Don’t keep the type of people in your life who cause you to feel stressed or who are the sort of people that always want something from you but are never prepared to give anything back when the boot is on the other foot. Cull those people from your life that drag you down time and time again and do more harm for your own mental state of mind than good.

People that abuse your friendship and use you in order to make themselves feel better really aren’t your friends.

They’re toxic.

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